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Showing posts from May, 2015

The Hazards of Adoption Reunion

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Adoption Reunion is a goal for many adoptees and in conversations with hundreds of other adoptees, I have learned that for many of us, once we make the decision to search, we tend to dive in head first without realizing the pitfalls and hazards of adoption reunion.  Much has been written about the benefits of adoption reunion and in my opinion, the benefits far outweigh the pitfalls. However, knowing in advance what the pitfalls can be, is helpful in better preparing you for them. This blog is in no way discouraging reunions, as I strongly believe searching and reunion is a normal and healthy desire.  All people, adopted or not, have a general curiosity about where they came from and in some cases, to want to know the people who brought them into the world, in addition to knowing their siblings and extended family. Many adoptees are getting information handed to them via opening of original birth certificates in some states or through generous and talented search angels in additi

Raise Your Hand if You are Adopted

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(Note: this blog was revised on 12/3/21 from it's original version published in 2015). The Sunday before Mother's Day, our family was sitting in the pew at church as was the usual routine.   I was hoping for a great mom-parable or just something "light" and "happy" to prepare for what many adoptees, can be a triggering day.  While the world celebrates mothers, many adoptees are grieving on that day. Sitting next to my daughter in our pew, I noticed she was drawing a picture.  My attention was drawn back to the sermon, as I heard the pastor discussing how God brings us into His family --- that He "adopts" us. I pay attention when I hear the word "adopt" as it is thrown around quite frequently in the media, legal field and as it relates to pets. So I was completely taken aback when I heard these words from the pastor, "If you are adopted, raise your hand." My eyes quickly darted around the church at the congregation and I n