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Showing posts from September, 2014

The Three Traumas of Adoption (based on the writings of Betty Jean Lifton)

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Photo credit:  psmag.com I have been re-reading Journey of the Adopted Self by Betty Jean Lifton (psychologist, author, adoptee).  I read it in 2006 at the beginning of my adoption reunion journey. The dedication at the beginning of the book reads like this: "To the memory of my adoptive mother Hilda and my birth Mother Rae who might have known and even liked each other in another life and another adoption system." I love this book.  I experienced so many revelations when reading this book the first time.  It was complete validation for everything I felt growing up and a realization that I am not crazy when I feel wounded, damaged or misplaced for growing up in closed adoption. As I've stated before, my opinion is that closed adoption is a form of emotional abuse.  After re-reading Journey of the Adopted self 8 years later post-reunion, I found that Betty Jean Lifton agrees with me.  She states that telling a child he or she is adopted without "really tel