Lynn Grubb

(To be read at “The Annual Remembrance of Craig Steffen” 6/25/17) Craig Steffen  I had to talk myself into coming today because I didn’t feel like I truly belonged (it’s an adoptee thing).  As I wrestled with it in my mind, I realized, if I don’t share this story at Craig’s remembrance, there would be nobody to tell this story to as Craig and I did not have any mutual friends nor did we know each other’s families (which then led to the thought . . . post this at your blog!). I knew Craig just barely a year, meeting him the summer of 2015 at The Bellbrook Library at a book signing.  A former co-worker of mine, an author herself, known as the City Skipper Gal , had interviewed Craig and written an article about Craig and posted it on my Facebook wall as she intuited correctly that Craig and I had a lot in common since we were both adopted and enjoyed writing.  The City Skipper Gal had seen my adoption-related blog posts come across her Facebook feed...

Pam Dixon Kroskie Tuesday night, I was interviewed for my first podcast by Pam Kroskie, President of Indiana Adoptee Network .  In order to plan for the show, I had asked Pam what we would be talking about; however, she prefers to just go with whatever topics come up . . . .so I didn't plan for the talk other than having a copy of The Adoptee Survival Guide sitting next to me on the table. . .  .and the time flew by! I first met Pam face-to-face last month during the inaugural adoption conference (go  here  for a post-conference update!).  It was a life changing event and I urge readers to consider going next year, April 20-21, 2018. Join Pam and I as we discuss our reunions, secrets, our birth father searches, and how much we both love adoption books. Thanks for listening!    Podcast Here

WHIO Reports Taping 3.16.17 I was really excited to be included in the WHIO Reports segment called Adoption in the Miami Valley (Go here  to see it).  Senator Bill Beagle, Adoptee Becky Drinnen and myself were all chosen for our involvement with Adoption Network Cleveland and their efforts to change a law that disallowed a group of adopted people access to their own records. The show was in response to the new law and to acknowledge the two-year anniversary of the opening of birth certificates and adoption files on March 20, 2017.  I am so pleased to have this story in the media and even more pleased that it was local to where I live and grew up. The video  you see during the show is (above) from the documentary called An Adoptee Roared in Ohio by Jean Strauss that tells the story of Betsie Norris, Executive Director of Adoption Network Cleveland.  I urge you to watch the whole thing.  There is a twist in the story that we didn't have time t...

Rhonda Churchill Patty Hawn Brian Stanton performs "BLANK" For more information about the conference and to sign up, go  here

It’s a rare moment when I can turn on a T.V. show that has adoption as part of its storyline and not cringe, roll my eyes and talk back to the T.V. about how they just don’t get it.   Sometimes it’s just downright painful to watch the same old stereotypes and adoption rhetoric play out. I don’t have that same experience when I watch NBC’s This is Us .  In fact, there are so many “ I can’t believe they got it right ” moments that it would take a whole series of blogs to ponder them. What the writers really get, is the complexity, that is adoption.  It appears that the writers did their research and interviewed transracial adoptees and read adoptee blogs to understand the complex experiences of being a transracial adoptee. Here is a list of some of the issues that are addressed in This is Us : *loyalty *fear of loss *abandonment *fear of being different *racial and sexual identity *identity crisis *reunion *family secrets *being gifted ...

The day I came home to my family (2-25-66) Today is my birthday. Traditionally, growing up I loved my birthday.  My mom always made me my favorite meal (lasagna) and chocolate cake with chocolate icing.  It was nothing extravagant like kid birthday parties are today.  It was just the four of us -- mom, dad, my brother Scott and me.  And that was enough.  There were no expectations that we would go to Bounce U, Laser Quest, McDonald's or have ponies parading in the yard.  I kind of miss those simple times. Having a December birthday, many people feel "ripped off" when they get the famous combo gift at Christmas, but that was not the case for me at all.  Far enough away but still able to take in the Christmas excitement on my birthday.  My 16th birthday was the best because I was able to invite four or five of my closest high school friends over to the house.  There was no drinking -- just cutting up and having fun. Birthdays as I got o...

Photo credit: Adoptionlearningpartners.org If I had a quarter for everytime somebody said the statement, "My ______ is not interested in searching" I could go on a nice vacation. Somebody said it to me me this week.  I cannot remember who but I remember it being said and it causes my mind to swirl with emotions and begin to shut down. I react to this statement viscerally because I'm sure it could have been said about me at some point in my life. And on top of that, I feel that this statement is a way of  negating anything I ever said to that person about my own adoption search, anything that they have ever heard me say about adoption or read that adoptees experience being adopted -- and even everything they heard from their adopted friend/cousin/niece/nephew/grand child) who doesn't want to search gets thrown into the box.  Then the box is labeled " Adoptee who Doesn't Feel Like You. " It may sound dramatic and you may accuse me of over-reac...