Lynn Grubb

My sealed birth certificate Historic events happened in Columbus, Ohio yesterday.  Not only was the vote UNANIMOUS in favor of the Adoptee Rights Bill (which will open birth certificates to adoptees between 196 4 -1996 and allow birth parents a contact preference form), the Catholic Conference of Ohio actually provided written support of HB 41!  This is in follow up to another practical miracle -- Ohio Right to Life backed us as well.  As Marley Greiner of Bastard Nation has been quoted as saying, "Pigs Really Do Fly!" Me with some fancy flying pigs I wish I could have been there but I got an account from a friend.  We all spent the previous day sending in our last-minute testimonies.  (you can find my testimony here). My best friend who has lived in Australia for 17 years (an Ohio adoptee) sent in her testimony.  I am posting my favorite part of it because it shows the opposite nature of how adoption is handled in Australia: " Although I...

 I have a confession to make:  I am addicted to Investigative Discovery t.v.  I could watch hours and hours of crime shows. I love how the story unfolds and then one day, when the killer thinks he has gotten away with murder and has set up a new life/new family and has neighbors who only say great things about him in interviews, is finally revealed as  (cue orchestra music) the killer or rapist For those of you who watch Maury Povich, you see this same relief and surprise on the faces of the baby daddies and the mamas who knew all along (they were 150% sure in fact) that he was the daddy.  How is this all possible? DNA! The detectives hide out and wait for that cigarette to be tossed on the street or they grab a dirty glass or straw or they test a used (licked) envelope or . . . . . .  . .   In the case of the serial killer nicknamed the “Grim Sleeper,” DNA samples he left at several crime scenes were a close partial match to ...

A while ago, I received the following email after Beth McCrea found my Paradox  post at Lost Daughters: "I would like to ask your permission to use your poem in our presentation to our provincial premier as we meet to discuss open records. I am one of the founding members of COARnb (Coalition for Open Adoption Records in New Brunswick) and we have been invited to meet with our Premier (Governor) in February. We are working with Sen. D'Allesandro of NH and Paule Benoit of ME. So many of our sons and daughters were adopted to the New England states and all over the US. We are fighting hard to give them their Chapter One, which is rightfully theirs." I was flattered but I didn't think much would come of it. I mean, it's just a poem. However, I knew this person was as passionate as I am about adoptee rights (and even more impressive because she is not adopted herself) but I didn't think my poem would be any big deal when it came to changing ...

Yesterday when I was sitting in Mass, Fr's Homily was about the Samaritan woman.  For those who aren't Bible scholars (myself included), it is when a Samaritan woman comes upon Jesus at the well and she is shocked when he speaks to her.  She does not recognize him as the Son of God at the well but as Fr. poignently pointed out, even though she had 5 husbands and was not currently married in her relationship (which was scandolous in Bible times), Jesus accepted her where she was. He wanted to know her story (even though he already knew it) He didn't try and change her He didn't tell her how to live her life better or differently He just accepted her where she was right then He cared about her story As I lunched with old friends after Mass, I looked around the table and realized that we can know people for years but never know their story.  Adoption came up in the conversation because my friend is a widower and wanted his wife to adopt the kids she is now m...

I've been thinking about why it has taken so long for the United States to grasp that adopted citizens should have a right to an accurate copy of their birth certificate. A struggle for the average citizen to understand adoptee rights comes from the urban legends that circulate like wildfire -- until they are seen as true --when in fact, they are false. The laws are far behind the realities of information, the internet and the wants and needs of modern original mothers and adult adoptees in domestic adoption. Adoptees are dying every day without their medical history, and the stories of their lives.  The progress has been slow since Oregon opened birth certificates to all adoptees in 2000. Read about Oregon's law here . The following myths are alive and well in the minds of the opposition of adoptee access to original birth certificates. Every adoptee needs to be well-versed in "talking points" when the legislature, family and friends ask valid quest...

There is a bill that was drafted by Sen. Lyle Hillyard ( R. Utah ) - SB155 - that would provide a mechanism to make open adoption agreements enforceable.   The intent behind the legislation is to initially effect foster-to-adopt families, but I strongly believe that it should also include private domestic infant adoption.  See article here . Not surprisingly, the NCFA (National Council for Adoption) is against this legislation. They are the number one opposer of adoptee rights, so it’s not a big stretch to see they don’t care about original families having continued contact with their children. David Hardy, a past president of the Utah Adoption Council, said there is no consensus on the issue among adoptive parents and he goes on to say: "There's certainly concern we're cheapening the parental relationship if you have an enforceable agreement.” Cheapening the parental relationship?  I think what he really means is adoptive par...

photo credit: Stu Phillips I took part in a discussion amongst other adult adopted women. This discussion become very heated when a particular original mother entered the conversation.  This original mother surrendered her child because, in essence, she didn't want to change her lifestyle and be a single parent.  This original mother spoke of all the traveling she has done and blogs about her life as an original mother in open adoption. I have never visited the blog, but I understand it offends many people, especially adoptees.   Most of my fellow adoptees felt offended by this woman because we were "her child"  at one time.  We were left and we all have a visceral reaction to hearing a mother discuss why she left her child (especially when those reasons appear shallow or selfish). Aside from that reaction, I asked the group why are women so hard on other women? Does this mother not have a right NOT to parent?  It's not like it is any easy task to ...